Then take 'vision impaired person' (VIP) – as uplifting as it may be to some, it smacks a bit of self-aggrandisement, so it simply won't do. 'Blindy' is honest but doesn't fit the public image I think we should all be aiming for.
Divided, we ain't going nowhere
Diversities are attractive enough but it's a bit of a nuisance when it comes to a common cause and, if we are going to scrub up, I reckon that's where we should start. Most of us have a natural tendency towards individuality, thus favour the multi-option choice when it comes to representation. Under the Plumbly Plan (modestly, I shall call it that) that will have to go. We have ministries and departments springing up like weeds and it's becoming more apparent that we need a charismatic leader. Once we've decided on him or her 'A Strategic Super Group' (SSG) could be formed to streamline the old image and formulate a modern plan. Just as 'Ms' replaced 'Miss' and 'partner' replaced 'spouse', there's heaps of verbal dross concerning us that could do with a sort out.
Lead us not into confusion
But it seems to me that those writing the rules are determined to confuse. We now have Whaikaha – Ministry of Disabled People, which, like a great deal of other government departments, seems to spend a fair amount of time conjuring up meaningful statements that, in essence, mean very little. For months now, they've been trundling out cautiously worded reports of their doings, sprinkled with inclusive stuff like ‘disabled’ and ‘handicapped’, neither of which fit a truly modern image. 'Disabled' implies a sort of physical apartheid and hints at permanence, while 'handicapped' might work OK for golfers and racehorses but does little in the way of normalising things for us.
Do PEEP peeps peep?
As someone far wiser than I once said, there should be no criticism without the offer of solution so, as part of my contribution to the new ‘us’, can I offer the following: we need to future-proof our image, rather than picking something out of the current PC basket. In keeping with modern thinking, the new title should, as I have said, be an acronym, with all the information built in, yet simple to grasp and even self-explanatory. After hours of brainstorming, I've decided PEEP (People Experiencing Eyesight Problems) might fit the bill. It's got it all, as far as I can see (excuse the pun): easy on the tongue, all-inclusive and with a hint of symbolism.
In keeping with the new image, we will need to smarten up some of the internal phraseology. I am all for a spot of window dressing but, to be honest, some of the stuff we are currently using is a bit on the heavy side. Common terms of late have included ‘enable’ and ‘empower’. As much as I am reluctant to suppress the creative juices of the folks who conjure up this stuff, I can't help feeling that those two in particular have reached the end of their usefulness. 'Enable' would suggest that we're lacking in some way; certainly we are, but I see no good reason why we should advertise it. And I don't know about you lot, but 'empower' somehow suggests it's applicable to a rundown battery. Surely, we can do better than that.
Rather than the somewhat biblical ‘enable’, how about ‘equip’? It's a more modern word and suggests we're kitted out and ready to move on. I'm a little too long in the tooth to be an active member of the SSG, nevertheless, I've still got a few nifty ideas I could contribute on a consultancy basis if called upon.
Meantime, folks, it might be worth thinking about becoming a PEEP.
